I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
