What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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