I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
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I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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