Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
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