Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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