I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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