hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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