I want to have your abortion
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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