oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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