Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
