Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Randomize
