There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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