You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
