he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
