Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
