Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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