Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
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