It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
