Just fell off a train. Bad.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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