is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize
