What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
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