Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
