guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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