we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
