Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize