whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Randomize
