This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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