Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize