hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
