the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
