there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
