Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
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