is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
