I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
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He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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