so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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