i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize