lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
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