Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize