If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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