i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize