He is like the real live version of the state fair..
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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