My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize