I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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