And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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