I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
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He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
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I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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