but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
