ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize