Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Randomize
