I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
