WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
